Quotes from every episode of All Dogs Go to Heaven: The Series.
"The Doggone Truth"Edit
- Sir Charles of Orleans: (Nervous and quickly answered to Queen Annabelle.) Verily, I slept overmuch. Queen Annabelle: (Sniffing the lies of Sir Charles.) [to Sir Charlie of Orleans] Liar, thy trousers art ablaze! (Thunder and lighting bolts strike truly upon Sir Charles's buttocks and he leaps in agony.) Sir Charles: Gadzooks!!
- Lord Itchiford: Zounds! Thou art wracked! SIR CHARLES!!!
- Queen Annabelle: Now, an thou wouldst fain tarry on Earth, thou needst do a good deed. A right good deed. Until thou dost, I place thee on probation.
- Mistress Sasha: Release me from thy grasp! (She is thrown out of the Flea Bite.) A gentleman would never work scath upon a lady such as I.
Horseface: By whose word art thou a lady?
Nelson the Killer: And by whose word be he a gentleman? (Horseface hits him.) Zounds!
Horseface: Cease thy prattling, knave!
Sir Charles: Mistress Sasha! What deeds hath here been wrought?
Mistress Sasha: Horseface did come and suggest means by which my tavern might be changed to suit him.
Sir Charles: And what doth suit him?
Mistress Sasha: My banishment doth suit him! He hath stolen my land, Sir Charles of Orleans!
Sir Charles: The villain! Would that I had been there!
Mistress Sasha: Where wert thou?
Sir Charles: The menagerie was alight, and 'twas my duty to soothe the king's rare fowls!
(Because this was a lie, and lying is a wickedness, a lightning bolt strikes Sir Charles and the pain inspires him to leap back to a cracked mirror.)
Queen Annabelle: Sir Charles of Orleans. (Sir Charles looks back at the mirror where Queen Annabelle then appears.) Thou art on probation. Thou canst not do, think, nor say any wickedness. I make not an exception for falsehood. Fare thee well.
Sir Charles: A thousand pardons. In sooth... I was feasting on beef and cheese, and it became known to me that Nelson the Killer was indeed the-- Gadzooks! Horseface! The rogue... 'Twas his plan to make trouble for us with design to foil our intervention. Let us pursue this matter, Itchikin.
- Nelson the Killer: Thou were ever a fool for a comely wench, my liege. (Horseface boxes his ears.) Zounds!
Horseface: 'Tis not a lackey's place to name me "fool."
- Queen Annabelle: Sir Charles of Orleans.
Charlie: Oho. My Queen. Wherefore thou dost employ unknightly guile upon me?
Annabelle: Hail to thee. 'Tis verily an odd sort of "good deed," but thou art free of thy probation, my vassal. For now, mayhap. Verily.
(She kisses his signet ring, but before he can look, her image is replaced by his reflection.)
- Annabelle: Teddy, you're not being very nice.
Teddy: Who are you, and why don't you mind your own business? (pause) Huh?
Charlie: Eh, I'd say this is our business. Wouldn't you agree, Teddy?
"Lance the Wonder Pup"Edit
- Charlie: Hey there, bea-utiful. Care for a ride?
Sasha: Oh, hello, Charlie. (More happily to see Itchy who is currently pulling a handcart with Charlie sitting on it.) Hi, Itchy.
Itchy: (giggles) Hi, Sasha.
Charlie: So, what do you say? You and me? A romantic ride through the park? Hmm?
Sasha: (sighs instantly) Charlie, there is no "you and me." I'm looking for a sensitive dog.
Charlie: I'm sensitive.
Sasha: How can you say that when you use your best friend as a pack mule?
Charlie: Oh, Itchy doesn't mind that, do ya, pal? (Notices that Itchy is heading someplace dangerous, but he can't help it.) Uh, Itch? You wanna slow down a bit?
(He can't, so they're speeding down.)
Sasha: Okay, I'll see you around, boys.
Charlie: Uh, Itchy? Itchy!
Itchy: Charlie! I can't stop!
(They scream and crash into a stop sign.)
- Annabelle: Good luck. Bonne chance.
- Charlie: Okay, Itchy, I admit it. If it hadn't been for Sasha, I wouldn't have adopted the stupid kid in the first place!
Sasha: Charlie Barkin! You are the most selfish, manipulating, insensitive mutt I have ever had the displeasure to know.
Charlie: Wait. Wait. I can explain.
Sasha: Using a tiny puppy just so you can impress a woman? Well, let me tell you, buster. I am not impressed!
Charlie: Oh, but I, I, I...
Sasha: I guess you were never a puppy, were you? Never helpless. Never scared and alone?
Charlie: Well, uh, I never thought of it that way.
Sasha: (sarcastically) Good night, Charlie Barkin!
Charlie: Wait. Sasha. You're right! I've been a jerk! I'm... (Charlie trips over a multi-layered cart) I'm sorry.
Itchy: Are you okay, Charlie?
Charlie: I'll be better when we find that pup.
"An Itch in Time"Edit
Assistant Principal Tanborman: [to David] I don't believe a word, & study for the next 2 hours, Young man.
Itchy: (whispers) It's a school, Charlie! It's not a bad place.
Charlie: (Asks Itchy refering to Assistant Principal Tanborman monitors in the school hall with binoculars on him) Then what's the warden doing over there?
Assistant Principal Tanborman: (Spotted Charlie & Itchy in school hall lockers) Scat! Shoo! No dogs allowed in these scatter halls!
Charlie: (panting, & running angered) Who's he callin' "dirty"?!
Assistant Principal Tanborman: Going somewhere,... [Charlie & Itchy gasp with buzz, & blow horn sfx]...doggy?
"Mutts Ado about Nothing"Edit
- Annabelle: You two have a wonderful friendship, but it's at stake right now. If you don't do something to save it, I will.
- Annabelle: If you can't see the diamond because of its flaws, you must walk a mile on each other's paws.
Charlie: I don't like this!
Annabelle: Too bad. Until you can learn to appreciate each other, you're stuck with it.